Man, have you ever just wanted to say, " Fuck it" and just walk out of you house and into somewhere where you can like, just sit and be yourself and live on your own? well, thats basicaqlly what i feel like every day. Dad is all over my back because he is just so frustrated with shit at work, Mom is stressed as a motherfucker since she has to work more than she usually does, and a lot of the aggression is being put into me, because im the only one that really ever gets in trouble all the time, They don't do this to mike and paddy, because by the time they do somethign stupid, they've spent their anger on me. I am moving out in January to a place on Lindbergh right by Meremac, and im going to live in a loft with Allison(a friend from school) because her parents will be paying for her rent and such, and all i gotta do is worry about the stuff that i need, like money for school, food, a car, and getting a job. Then, i will have whatever time is left over to have the fun that i wanna have and such.Sure, im leavign a place where most of the shit i have is paid for by my parents, but i truly don't want to keep worrying them about how i am and all that shit, and i am more of a financial burden on them than mike or paddy because Car insurance is fucking ludicrous for me, and i just dont' ever feel like i haev freedom to do what i want and stuff, i always have curfew when im fucking 18, im groudned all the time, i never get to do anything with friends it seems, and to top it all off, i no longer have a car that i can drive because they took it away because " im not being responsible". Thats horse shit. Plus my therapist thinks im on drugs, i haven;t smoked or drank since like fucking April of this year. He never told me about any of this, so now i have lost a fuckload of trust in all this, PLUS it feels like im losing my best friend, Kerri, to my x-girlfriend, Crystal. It hurts real bad man.

But hey, keep on truckin, i ghotta else im going to just end up on my face and i don't want that. It brings too many dark and sad thoughts back with it,.